Teleplay   Before There Was A Giant

Story by Dave Hall & Tim Sulka

Teleplay by Tim Sulka
Lyrics by Dave Hall & Tim Sulka

Music by Dave Hall

 

 

EPISODE ONE: JACK AND THE BEANSTALK

 

Our story so far... After climbing the vine, Jack encounters Mr. Giant, not a real giant, but a giant of commerce and industry, who promises him fame and riches in exchange for signing the rights away to his precious cow painting and all other art. Jack is overwhelmed by all the wealth he sees as Mr. Giant puts on the hard sell.

 

INT. GIANT ENTERPRISES - MR. GIANT'S OFFICE - DAY

 

Jack stares up at Mr. Giant who leers. Jack's favorite painting of the cow, Esmerelda, hangs on the wall behind Mr. Giant.

          JACK

But I don't know anything about

business, or contracts, or...

    (dejected)

...money

 

          MR. GIANT

That's where I come in! If you sign

on the dotted line, I'll make sure that your precious Esmerelda is plastered on lunchboxes, tshirts, skateboards and even mousepads! She'll be bigger than Taylor Swift!

 

          JACK

But will commerce make me happy?

 

          MR. GIANT

You’re an artist. You’re not

supposed to be happy.

 

          JACK

Just starving...

 

          MR. GIANT

That, too! Listen, Jack, what I’ve

done for artists in this city is unprecedented!

Mr. Giant's “team” materializes around him. They sing as he steps up on his desk and strikes a determined pose.

 

Song: Before There Was a Giant

 

          GIANT’S TEAM

BEFORE THERE WAS A GIANT

 

          MR. GIANT

    (pointing down at Jack)

THE WORLD WAS SMALL AND PUNY

 

          GIANT’S TEAM

BEFORE THERE WAS A GIANT

 

          MR. GIANT
THIS TOWN WAS CRAZY, LOONEY

Mr. Giant jumps down in front of Jack, who shrinks into his chair.

MR. GIANT (CONT’D)

GUYS LIKE YOU NEVER CAUGHT A BREAK

 

          GIANT’S TEAM

OOOOOOOOOOH

 

          MR. GIANT/TEAM

THINK BACK, JACK

Team members rush in carrying trays of food; one a sizzling steak, another with a large piece of chocolate cake. Perfectly choreographed, they sweep past Jack, enticing him, but keeping the food out of his grasp.

          MR. GIANT

J'YA EVER HAVE A PIECE OF REALLY

JUICY STEAK?

 

          JACK

     (tries, but is unable to

      reach the food)

Not really.

 

MR. GIANT

OR A SLICE OF REALLY, CHOCOLATY,

CHOCOLATY CAKE?

 

          JACK

Mmmmmm...

Mr. Giant pulls Jack up and out of his chair.

 

 

INT. GIANT ENTERPRISES - WORKROOM - MOMENTS LATER

 

Mr. Giant, Jack and Giant's team breeze through a room full of artists busily at work. They perk up, grinning from ear to ear, at the sight of Mr. Giant.

 

          GIANT’S TEAM

BEFORE THERE WAS A GIANT

 

          MR. GIANT

THE SUN WOULD NEVER SHINE.

 

          GIANT’S TEAM

BEFORE THERE WAS A GIANT

 

          MR. GIANT

IT WAS GRAPE JUICE, NEVER WINE!

GUYS LIKE YOU NEVER STOOD A CHANCE

 

          GIANT’S TEAM

OOOOOOOOOOH

ANOTHER ANGLE

Unseen by Jack, the artists’ legs are shackled to their work tables. All is NOT what it seems.

          MR. GIANT/TEAM

THINK BACK, JACK

 

          MR. GIANT

WHEN'S THE LAST TIME YOU GOT A 

SECOND GLANCE
FROM ANY PRETTY GIRL AT THE HIGH S
CHOOL DANCE?

 

          JACK

Ooh, that reminds me! I have to get my GED!

 

Jack gets a glimpse of GOLDIE GOSLING, one of the artists,
who smiles at him from her work station where she makes cupcakes. Jack blushes. Mr. Giant grabs his arm and pulls him to the next room.

 

 

INT. GIANT ENTERPRISES - GAME ROOM - LATER

 

Jack and Mr. Giant (in tennis whites) face off in front of a large screen, playing a game of Wii tennis. Mr. Giant is an expert; Jack can barely keep up with him.

          MR. GIANT/TEAM

WHAT YOU LACK, JACK

 

          MR. GIANT

IS PRETTY ORDINARY

 

          MR. GIANT/TEAM

WHERE YOU'RE SLACK, JACK

 

          MR. GIANT

IT’S SIMPLY, MONETARY

WHAT YOU NEED IS A GUY WHO CAN

RAISE YOU HIGH

 

          GIANT’S TEAM

OOOOOOOOOOH

 

          MR. GIANT

WHO COULD PUT YOU ON THE INSIDE

TRACK,

Mr. Giant takes a final shot and of course, wins. His team is ready with a towel and robe for him. Jack is on his butt, exhausted.

          MR. GIANT/TEAM

JACK!

INT. GIANT ENTERPRISES - DINING ROOM - LATER

 

In his monogrammed white bathrobe, Mr. Giant sits at a candlelit table, taking small tastes of a wide array of delicacies, spoon-fed by his team. Jack watches hungrily. One of the team periodically wipes Mr. Giant's mouth with a napkin. There’s plenty of food. But none for Jack.

          MR. GIANT

I'LL HELP YOU UNRAVEL THE GREATEST

MYSTERY
OF ALL THE BIGGEST MEN IN ALL OF HISTORY
THEN WE'LL TAKE ALL THOSE PAINTINGS ALL BRUSHED AND SWIRLED
AND PUT YOU ON TOP OF THE ARTISTIC WORLD
THINK OF THE GOLD OF TUTANKHAME

SERIES OF SHOTS


Mr. Giant waves away a bowl of noodles.

          JACK

Wait! Is that a bowl of ramen?

Mr. Giant contemplates eating a large turkey leg.

          MR. GIANT

THINK OF ARTHUR AND HIS CAMELOT

Jack drools at the sight.

                      JACK

These days, I thinkabout ham - a lot! 

Mr. Giant sips from a golden goblet.

          MR. GIANT

THEN THINK OF LOUIS AT VERSAILLES

 

          JACK

SORRY, I NEVER HEARD OF THE GUY -

Oooh, pie!

          MR. GIANT

REMEMBER, GUY, HERE AM I, STANDING

BY 
    (stands, slaps Jack on his

     back, the force knocking

     Jack to the floor.)

COVERIN' YOUR EVER LOVIN' BACK,

 

          MR. GIANT/TEAM

JACK!

          GIANT'S TEAM

BEFORE THERE WAS A GIANT

 

          MR. GIANT

PATRONIZING ALL THE ARTS

 

          GIANT’S TEAM

BEFORE THERE WAS A GIANT

 

          MR. GIANT

GIVING DUMMIES THEIR HEAD STARTS

 

          GIANT’S TEAM

OOOOOOOOOOH

 

          MR. GIANT

EVERYONE ONE WAS JUST DAYDREAMIN'

AND WISHIN'

Jack gets to his knees, peeks around Mr. Giant who remains the focus.

 

EXT. GIANT ENTERPRISES - ROOFTOP SPA - LATER

 

Wrapped in his bathrobe, and sitting on a chair/throne, Mr. Giant is being attended by his team; face shaved, nails filed, hair groomed, etc. Jack is ignored, looking the messy unkempt artist he is.

 

A bite of pie for Mr. Giant and it is taken away.

Mr. Giant stands, holds out his arms. His team removes his robe. Underneath, he wears a new, expensive, designer suit. Once again, he looks impeccable. Even his teeth gleam.

          MR. GIANT/TEAM

THINK BACK, JACK

 

Mr. Giant and his team approach Jack, backing him up step by step.

          MR. GIANT

AM I DESCRIBING YOUR POSITION?

 

          MR. GIANT/TEAM

THINK BACK, JACK

Jack backs up, looks around in a panic. He’s running out of room on the roof.

 

          MR. GIANT

WHEN WAS YOUR LAST COMMISSION?

 

          MR. GIANT/TEAM

THINK BACK, JACK

ANOTHER ANGLE

 

Mr. Giant presses his face into Jack’s who has reached the rooftop edge. Jack gives a sidelong glance at the long drop to the street below him.

          MR. GIANT

DID YOU EVER HAVE AMBITION?

WANT TO CRUSH THE COMPETITION?

Mr. Giant pulls Jack safely from harm and puts his arm around him.

          MR. GIANT (CONT'D)

STICK WITH ME, YOU AND I, WE'LL

STAND SO HIGH

ANOTHER ANGLE - AERIAL SHOT

 

Mr. Giant, Jack and the Team stand on the roof of the building, the expanse of the city before them.

 MR. GIANT (CONT’D)

WE'LL BE THE LEADERS OF THE WHOLE

DARN PACK, JACK!

INT. GIANT ENTERPRISES - LOBBY - LATEm

 

Mr. Giant and Jack sweep into the room as the team dances, swirling around Mr. Giant and Jack.

          GIANT’S TEAM

BEFORE THERE WAS A GIANT

 

          MR. GIANT

THE WORLD WAS SMALL AND PUNY!

 

          GIANT’S TEAM

BEFORE THERE WAS A GIANT

 

          MR. GIANT

THIS TOWN WAS CRAZY, LOONEY!

Verse continues instrumentally, dance break.

          GIANT’S TEAM

BEFORE THERE WAS A GIANT

 

          MR. GIANT

THE SUN WOULD NEVER SHINE.

 

          GIANT’S TEAM

BEFORE THERE WAS A GIANT

 

          MR. GIANT

IT WAS GRAPE JUICE, NEVER WINE!

Verse continues instrumentally, dance break.

          MR. GIANT/TEAM

WHAT YOU LACK, JACK

 

          MR. GIANT

IS PRETTY ORDINARY

 

          MR. GIANT/TEAM

WHERE YOU'RE SLACK, JACK

 

          MR. GIANT

IT’S SIMPLY, MONETARY

WHAT YOU NEED IS A GUY WHO CAN

RAISE YOU HIGH

 

          GIANT’S TEAM

OOOOOOOOOOH

 

          MR. GIANT

WHO CAN PUT YOU ON THE INSIDE

TRACK,

 

          MR. GIANT/TEAM

JACK

Mr. Giant is lifted onto a high table by his team. His presence commands the room. Jack stares dizzily as Mr. Giant rolls out a long and complex contract. His team members hold up the contract for Jack.

 

          MR. GIANT

WHAT YOU NEED IS A GUY WHO COULD

RAISE YOU HIGH

 

          GIANT’S TEAM

OOOOOOOOOOH

 

Holding a gold pen, Mr. Giant lures Jack to the contract, puts the pen in his hand.

 

          MR. GIANT

WHO COULD PUT YOU ON THE INSIDE

TRACK,

 

          MR. GIANT/TEAM

JACK!

 

Jack’s hand is poised, ready to sign.

 

 

(END SONG)